A New School, A New Abuse

I couldn't take it anymore. I don't think I can pinpoint exactly what made me throw up my hands in surrender. It really was a culmination of things. But, if I am really, really honest with myself it is because Solomon was shot in the head. He lived. But, he is not alive. I visited him in the hospital, and I cried like I never cried before. Harder than I did when my first baby miscarried. Seeing him there in the hospital, remembering his smile and his determination in completing the most difficult of crossword puzzles, and watching him stare into space. It was too much. I held his hand, and just cried. And as I went to leave, he gripped my hand. A death grip. But, I couldn't. A 9th grader, a drop out, a drain on the economy, a boy. I pulled myself out of his death grip, kissed him on the forehead and told him to get better and do better. And then everything unraveled for me. The ridiculous amounts of paperwork that kept me up until 12:30 at night, up at 4:30 am, just to hear teachers maligned by...everybody. It got to be too much.

I left. I fled, actually. To the cozy comforts of my daughter's Catholic school. Now I am the director of special education, working with the children of friends. And there's a whole other sort of abuse that goes on. I don't worry about these children on the streets. I don't worry about them being abused. But, boy are they coddled and nothing is their fault. I reprimanded a student for talking rudely too me. It was a horrible reprimand. I reminded her that she is a student, and I am a teacher and she needs to speak with respect, then told her good-bye and to have a nice afternoon. The next day her mother was waiting for me to discuss the interaction. This is par for the course. Virtually every parent at this school feels they can know better than teachers because they have all sat in classrooms.

And I still have my ghetto fight in me. If anything, that kind of "blame the teacher" attitude steels me for being vigilante. Because I don't care about my job. But, I do care about my students. And I will do what is best for them as I see fit as a professional educator regardless of the setting I am in.

Being a grown up can be so hard. Being a parent is tricky. If you pay a tuition to send your kids to a school, it is my humble opinion that you trust the professionals. And if you don't, leave the school.

Teachers should be happy. No one has pensions anymore!

But teachers don't get social security.

Let me repeat that: teachers do not get social security.

Teachers cannot individually negotiate salary increases during their annual reviews as those in the corporate world do. As I did when I was in the corporate world.

Teachers need collective bargaining rights.

I have to say, I'm a pretty damn good negotiator. I miss being able to negotiate my salary. But, my administrator has no power to increase my salary or not because the budget is decided by legislators who the people have elected.

So, if she thinks I'm worth $250,000, which I am, she can't pay me that.

Perhaps, if the yahoos at Lehman Brothers had been tied to a scheduled salary and a multi-year contract, we would not be in the state we are in now. Teachers didn't create this mess. Unions did not create this mess. It's time to get angry at Wall Street. Not Main Street.

The IEP.Part I

What is an IEP? It is an Individualized Education Plan for students with special needs. Just thinking about them makes me tired.

IEPs are supposed to be written so that teachers know what educational goals are obtainable by the individual student, as well as how to accommodate such students when they are in the teachers' classrooms as well as what modifications can be made to help them succeed in school. They can be quite useful. If you are a teacher who has a student coming into your class who has Asperger's, then the IEP should provide a lot of useful tips on how to include the student in your class.

But, we're in Chicago. And because of the Corey H. lawsuit that basically said that "Corey H." was unfairly excluded from the general education classroom, and placed in too restrictive of a classroom, CPS has gone nuts on "fine tuning" the IEP in an attempt, I assume, to avoid lawsuits. CPS would argue that it is to help students with special needs access the general education curriculum. I don't think so. The current version of he IEP that CPS uses (not only do states have different IEPs, but virtually every district in Illinois can have a different version) is a document that is written with so many mandated details that it is now a great piece of writing for lawyers to mull over. And it's stupid.

Why? Because it requires that teachers write narratives of test scores. Let's say a student achieves a scale score of 250, which places them in a stanine of 3, in the 8th percentile, and in the "below standards" category. (These numbers might not add up and I am too tired at this point to use an actual example by clicking into the very slow Impact web site that has my students' scores.) Now, the general education teachers have approximately 30 students. The middle school teachers have approximately 90 students since they see several homerooms. The high school teachers, can have about 200 students. Now, with SWDs (students with disabilities) being included in more general education classes (something that I did not originally agree with but have made a 360 on) the g.e. teachers must familiarize themselves with their SWDs and their IEPs.

So what?

Well, that's a lot of IEPs to read. As a special education teacher, I don't want to add more work to my colleague, the g.e. teacher. I want them to feel confident that they can accommodate my students and to not feel burdened by their inclusion. So, as most teachers would tell you, provide as much information as quickly as possible. So to make things easy, it would make sense to snapshot the scores of the above mentioned student as such:

ISAT Reading Score 2010-2011

Scale Score 250

Stanine 3

Percentile 8

Rank "Below Standards"

Right? Is that easy to understand?

But, nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnoooooooooooooooooooooo. I have to write a narrative. Therefore, I add noun determiners, verbs and adjectives. So, then the above turns to "On the 2010-2011 reading portion of the ISATs, student A achieved a scale score of 250, which places him in a stanine of 3, the 8th percentile, and ranks him below standards."

Now the powers that be will tell you that they want a little more explanation. O.k. "Student A scored below standard due to his learning disability that negatively affects his ability to read at grade level."

But, wait. It gets better. This information is one of the many sections included on the "Language and General Considerations" portion of the IEP. Where I have to write the actual goals for reading, I have to also include the ISAT information. But, I am not supposed to cut and paste. Therefore, I have to move the noun determiners, the adjectives, the verbs, the scores, and my ingenious observations around a bit. Because God forbid I cut and paste information that is relevant as it is.

Well, my battery is about to die and I am going to take that as a sign that I should stop here. I will add more later. (It gets better.)

Let Me Make Something Perfectly Clear

I love my school. I have a great principal and am surrounded by professional, dedicated teachers. I have students hungry to be the best they can be as they struggle to figure out what that is for themselves. Chalkboard Warrior, in recent posts, turned into a sounding board of my daily frustrations. I blame this on the just juggling too many balls. That is not the point of this blog. The point is to show how policies--all I believe well intentioned--are implemented on the ground, often creating paperwork, but no real improvement in education. Not all policies mind you. There have been some that I believed were ridiculous that I now admit have benefited my students. There are others that could benefit students but compete with other policies and therefore make it impossible for teachers to fully implement. But, I have digressed. This blog entry is to make perfectly clear that this blog is not about my current school in the least bit. I love my school. It is a beacon of hope in the midst of chaos. I am very thankful to be located at a school where I feel happy and lucky to spend my days there.

My next few posts will be dedicated to IEPs. What are IEPs? Check back in a week. :)

I'm back

I just posted my final project for the course I'm taking to get middle school certified. Balancing work, mothering, etc., etc., the whole thing took a lot longer than I had planned. And I have been neglecting my blog for so long that half the chalkboards in my room are now whiteboards. But I'm still a warrior and will be posting more often in the new year, and hopefully the quality of the posts will increase. (Lately, they've been rants and whines, which is not my goal here.) It's is 10:30 at night, and I'm going to get some Zs. Will be back soon.

ChalkboardWarrior's response to CEO's announcement

Just a rant about how Ron Huberman's announcement that he is stepping down highlights silly policies. Below is a post I tried to add to the Trib's article, but it wouldn't take. So here it is:

If only teachers had the same luxury of leaving their jobs to pursue another when a change in administration is about to take place. But they don't. In fact, teachers who are laid off have to resubmit all their records and do a second background check even if they have served the students of CPS for 17 years and have only had a gap in service for two days. This is a fact. When said teacher asked Human Resources why they had to go through all this again when they were only out of the system for two days, the callous response was "Because we don't know what you could have done in two days." Nice.

Furthermore, teachers cannot leave their position for a position at another school without an approved transfer from their current boss. Teachers who leave in the middle of the year are often fleeing abusive or inept principals. The likelihood of such a principal signing a transfer is next to nil.

Perhaps Mr. Huberman would like to try out teaching? Oh. Wait. That's right, he is not qualified to teach in the classroom. This is not a reflection on Mr. Huberman, but the ridiculous policies governing, or as I like to say, impeding, education. Huberman should be allowed to teach in the classroom. He has valuable worldly and business experience that could benefit many students. But the State of Illinois won't let him. Silly.

September 27 and schedule hasn't started

Sorry to take so long to write. But, I am still working hard to figure out my schedule and who is reporting what grades for each of my students in special education. This should be done before school starts, right? Oh, yes. Why isn't it? Because of craziness that I will write about in more detail once my lesson plans are finally written and testing ends. It should end Thursday. First true entry will be entered the following week.

When I Get Shot

A diary entry from 2005:

When do I cross the line from helping to enabling? I keep running into this question year after year. I work with many families with little or no money who often need help from the mental health community. I work with students with disabilities. Specifically, middle school children with emotional disorders and/or learning problems. Every now and then I have a student in desperate need of services outside the realm of what a school is equipped to give. Such is the case for Kelvin.

Kelvin is a student in my class who has suffered great losses this year. Kelvin’s baby brother died earlier this year, his favorite aunt was killed in a bizarre car accident two months later, and an uncle passed away two weeks after his aunt died. To say he has had a string of bad luck is an understatement.

Any one of these tragedies is enough to bring an adult to his knees. But, not Kelvin. The day of his brother’s funeral he came to school after the burial so that he wouldn’t ruin his perfect attendance. And the day after hearing of his aunt’s death, he came to school “to make her proud.”

But, as is common for anyone dealing with tragedies, Kelvin started having problems. He would suddenly start crying. He began to withdraw from friends. And as is common for adolescent boys dealing with difficult emotions, Kelvin started lashing out and getting in trouble more and more.

Yesterday, the counselor, social worker, assistant principal and I met with Kelvin’s parents to discuss how we could get him more help. We told them about a program. The parents were receptive. So, we started moving forward. Because his parents are one of the millions of functioning illiterates in America, we called the clinic to make the appointment, we called the insurance company to ensure that the services would be covered, we provided a letter to the hospital describing our observations and concerns, we provided three pages of anecdotals, and we had a cab take them to in-take where Kelvin was immediately placed into their outpatient day school. His mother was offered free bus passes, but she declined, saying she would be able to get him there. Kelvin would start the program the next day—today.

Relief. All the elements had come together. Today Kelvin would be getting the help he so desperately needs.

This morning I drove into work feeling good. I took a detour from my regular morning route to treat myself to a café mocha and spent a little extra time in the parking lot savoring the sunny morning and listening to the radio before walking into the school.

And there was Kelvin. With him were his father and grandmother. It was 8:30. The program, more than an hour away from our school, was expecting Kelvin to be in its class at 9:00.

Despair.

The father said he had no way of getting Kelvin to the school. I informed him that the mother had declined bus passes because she said she would get Kelvin there. The father said he wasn’t aware of that because he hadn’t gone to the clinic with her and hadn’t spoken to her since yesterday. So, we got him bus passes.

The father asked me for the address. I went on the Internet, got the address, wrote it down, gave it and read it to him. The father asked me what bus line should he take.

I got back on the Internet and searched the CTA routes. As I was explaining the directions to the father and Kelvin, his little grandmother started yelling at me: “The school needs to provide transportation; you need to get him there.” At this point, I was tapped. I just didn’t have an ounce of energy left in me to be diplomatic, so I just ignored the grandmother and said to the father, “You really need to start going; he’s already late.”

And I am sapped. Kelvin is at a crossroads. He lives in the projects. Gangs are trying to recruit him. He has a severe learning disability. He has serious mental health issues. Yet, he is very good with computers, speaks eloquently and can be very sympathetic to others in need. He has a smile that just melts your heart. Is it enough?

Kelvin and I were once having one of those student-teacher talks where we were discussing what our futures would look like in five years, 10 years time. He started telling me, “When I get shot…”

I stopped him.

“What do you mean ‘when I get shot?’ I asked incredulously.

“Ms. Blogger,” he said matter-of-factly, “everyone in my neighborhood gets shot.”

He then continued with his story, telling me how his father would hunt down and kill the shooters. I must have had an inquisitive look on my face, because he said, “Well, of course, I mean if I don’t get killed. I mean if I just get hurt from the bullets.”

I told him aside from television and movies I had never actually heard a gun shot.

Now he was incredulous. “You’ve never heard a gun shot?”

“No.”

“I hear them every night.”

“How do you sleep?” I asked him.

“Fine,” he said. “I just put the pillow over my head so I don’t hear nothin’.”

Will Kelvin make it?

Can I help him?

I just don’t know.

I want to say every child can be saved. Every child can have a future. But, how much gumption does a child need?

With every fiber of my being I want Kelvin to have a wonderful life. But. I just don’t know.

(Sidenote: Kelvin and Paz were best friends when I taught them. Paz is lying in an almost vegetative state, recovering from the bullet that entered the back of his head and exited his forehead, at the City Hospital. I asked his mother if Kelvin knows. She did not know. Last we heard, Kelvin had dropped out of high school and was in an opposing gang. Maybe it's better that Kelvin does not know.)

The Cancer Strikes Again

It's my 9th year of teaching.

My third student is in the hospital fighting for his life, riddled with the same cancer that killed two previous students.

I know in the science world correlation doesn't necessarily mean causation. But cigarettes do cause cancer. I'm not a doctor, but this cancer seems to be killing poor teenagers who have learning disabilities. I've worked in a wealthy neighborhood and no one died from this cancer. I now work in a poor neighborhood, and this cancer has directly killed four students, indirectly killed another (he committed suicide after being struck by it), permanently maimed four, and now another one lies in the hospital in a vegetative state on life support. When is the medical community going to address this crisis?

Rambling

Dear Anyone,

I don't understand why pubic school teachers are vilified. I shouldn't take it personally but I do. I am saddened by Obama's rush to pat the collective back of the people who fired the Rhode Island teachers. O.k. I get it. The education system is a mess. There are teachers out there who are absolutely terrible. But, firing the whole staff? There wasn't one dedicated teacher among them? There wasn't one teacher who dragged him/herself to school determined to reach kids who seem unreachable? Where else does a failing system call for the firing of all those involved? My recollection is the bankers who brought this country to its knees were paid bonuses and/or huge salaries to maintain the best and the brightest? Our student's scores fail to reach the nebulous benchmark set by politicians (not educators) and that is cause for dismissal?

Let me explain to those of you who may not know. The standards determined by NCLB are...how shall I put it...bogus. See the states get to determine the test and the benchmark for passing. So, let's say, hypothetically, State A and State B give the same test. Well, State A says 80% is what they are going to consider "exceeding standards." State B decides 36% is what they consider "exceeding standards." The students take the test. The results come in. Drumroll please. 50% of the students in State A achieve 80% or higher, the other half all get a 75%. In State B, 50% do not even make 60%, a score considered "failing" by most educators. But, based on the criteria of NCLB, State B, whose students did not even get a "passing" grade met standards. State A students did not meet the benchmark. Fire all the teachers in State A.

Reread that paragraph a few times to get your head around it.

Here's another thing that I don't understand. At a party yesterday there was talk of dismantling the Teacher Unions. Here is an argument I hear all the time. "What other profession gets a pension?" Let me answer that for you. The professions that are entitled to social security. The professions where you can individually negotiate salary. The professions where personal performance is weighed more heavily than the collective whole who is measured by whether they reach an outside agency's standard.

Now, in the interest of full disclosure, I happen to be a union representative. But, when my fellow co-workers came to me to ask me to represent the staff, I said I would represent the good teachers and my job would be to focus on our school. Not the collective whole. Because I don't want to speak for someone's performance I am not aware of. Lo and behold. I got elected. Because most teachers don't want bad teachers in the mix. And it is ridiculous that bad teachers can continue to teach and/or move from school to school. It is tantamount to my own religion's insane policy of moving molesting priests from church to church and not defrocking them.

But, should all priests be fired? Should all teachers be fired? No. No. No!

How can I get you to walk a mile in our shoes? How can I get Obama and other politicians to understand the world of education?

Last week, during our 15 minute lunch, my fellow teachers and I were talking about Johnny. We buried Johnny last year. He was pulled into gang life and was shot by rival gang members who had driven into the city from a SUBURB! (It's everywhere.) He had been on our minds because his death happened around ISATs and we noted how the students' scores were more than likely affected by the tragedy. How can you sit and concentrate when you just buried your friend? But, we teachers, we took the challenge and ran with it. We all went to the funeral home. We all talked about honoring the good parts of Johnny by doing the best for ourselves. Even Johnny had said he didn't want to be a gang member but didn't know how to get out. (Just saying you want to get out puts your life at risk.)

And all to similar to Johnny, is Michael. Michael shines in math. But, he has a hard time concentrating in school. He has been to 12. 3 times at our school. He is an 8th grader. He is being pulled into the gang life. When I assist him with his math, I want to shake him by the shoulders and scream, "Please don't join a gang!" But, I just teach math.

This week, we had a gang intervention assembly. There were 4 former gang members, one in a wheelchair. The men reenacted the scenes from the wheelchair-bound man's life. It was dramatic. The men used a gun prop. Before the reenactment occurred. They warned us. It would be loud. The play went on and what ended up happening was, one guy walked over to another, shot him in the back and as he lay on the ground, shot him again in the head. There was stunned silence in the auditorium and tears just instantly streamed down my face. That's how Johnny died. And although I fought the thought and the image as much as I could, I thought, "that's how Michael could die."

Maybe not. But when I look at the faces of the 8th graders, he is the one I worry the most about. Michael ended up talking privately with the men and that is a great sign of hope. And after the assembly while we were waiting for the bell to ring, he and I shared our "education" handshake--a silly thing that started earlier this year when I called him out on doing gang signs. I told him I only wanted to see the "education" sign and we made up a goofy shake that basically is a hand shake, two pumps to the chest, and a peace sign in the air, with a shout-out to education.

Maybe my scores won't be the best this year. Maybe the school's scores won't be the best this year. But there are so many factors that affect the outcome. Even if all our scores go down, I don't think firing our staff will help. And it would only devastate the children who have been devastated enough.

XO
Chalkboard weary

Freeze the Freeze

Below is an op-ed from the Suntimes. And below that are my comments.

No way around CPS teacher pay freeze

Comments

February 26, 2010

Chicago Public Schools CEO Ron Huberman on Thursday painted the grimmest financial picture the Chicago schools have ever seen.

The budget deficit could top $900 million, a hole so big that Huberman says he needs major concessions from teachers -- a move that could easily lead to a teachers' strike if the unions refuse to play ball.

We're not alerting parents to cause a panic or to bash beleaguered teachers.

We're alerting parents now, when there's still time, to try to resolve this crisis and avoid a strike.

The best hope is for the Chicago teachers to accept a wage freeze.

Huberman can't say that out loud. On Thursday, he simply laid out the sorry facts of the deficit, saying concessions are one piece of a multi-part solution. He's courting the unions now, giving them a chance to pick their poison, hoping they'll offer up cost-saving ideas.

But it is nearly impossible to see a way out of this mess -- or a teachers' strike -- without a wage freeze.

The Chicago Teachers Union contract locks in 4 percent raises through 2012 -- really about 5.5 percent with experience and higher degrees added in. Eliminating that raise in 2011 saves $135 million.

Undoubtedly, the union will balk at a wage freeze. Already, Union President Marilyn Stewart has rejected altering the union contract.

In turn, Huberman won't budge, arguing he has no cash to spare -- and he won't be lying.

Then what? Months of stalemate.

In fatter years, CPS would avert a strike by caving. This year, CPS does not have the dollars to give.

CTU has no choice but to seriously consider the wage freeze. Not because teachers don't deserve a raise. Not because teachers should pay for poor planning and mismanagement by CPS over the years.

But because we see no alternative.

CPS' massive budget deficit, Huberman says, is driven by three biggies: a $138 million drop in tax revenue, $135 million in increased salary costs and, most significantly, a $280 million increase in its pension bill.

Dealing with that pension bill is part two of Huberman's strategy for reining in the deficit.

Between 2009 and 2011, the cost of pensions jumps from $178 million to $587 million to comply with a formula set by state law. Huberman is lobbying Springfield to drop that bill by $300 million. He's also, wisely, pushing to correct a funding formula that unfairly favors the pension fund for non-Chicago teachers over the CTU's pension fund.

The union will resist on reducing the pension payment, though CPS could use their help. The union blames CPS for creating the problem -- for decades, a portion of property tax dollars was dedicated to CTU's pension, but CPS ended that in 1995. The union has a good point. The pension fund lost out on between $1.5 and $2 billion in payments over a decade. But CPS must deal with today, not the past.

Huberman also wants more money from Springfield, which almost certainly won't happen, and plans on deep cuts in central office and school programs. This is on top of 1,000 layoffs and vacant position closures expected this school year. CPS needs to be transparent about these cuts, which it hasn't been so far, to assure the public that real cuts are taking place.

Wages for non-union CPS staff are already frozen, and they'll take 15 unpaid days this year.

No one wants to deny hard-working teachers a raise.

But we see no other way.

Without union concessions -- one of CPS' only guaranteed ways to save money -- CPS is looking at devastating cuts in every corner of the school system.

Ron Huberman isn't crying wolf.

It's time for big concessions now -- rather than face massive disruption in the schools and an ugly and fruitless strike down the road.

FREEZE THE FREEZE

Freeze the fireworks for a year.
Re-negotiate the parking meter fiasco to at least get a percentage of the revenues.
Freeze the festivals for a year.
Freeze park programs for a year.
Freeze turnaround school program for a year.
Reduce CPS non-union pay positions--administrative, board--to the maximum amount that the most veteran teacher makes.
Freeze the greenery of the medians for a year.
Close schools on snow days and reduce salt use.
Freeze the guns-for-cash program.
Freeze the traffic directors program for a year.
Freeze the Universal Breakfast Program for a year.
Make an Olympic effort to have the world's best school system.

A Penny Saved is a Penny Earned

www.chicagotribune.com/news/chi-chicago-schools-cars-14-jan15,0,4102489.story

chicagotribune.com

Tribune watchdog

Chicago schools vehicle-lease deal: Inspector general investigating staffers' use of cars

Spokeswoman says proper procedures were not followed in leasing vehicles

By Todd Lighty and Azam Ahmed

Tribune reporters

January 15, 2010

The Chicago Public Schools inspector general has launched an investigation into senior staff's use of leased cars, including an SUV driven by schools chief Ron Huberman that's equipped with satellite radio and heated seats.

The investigation was sparked by a Tribune story Sunday that disclosed Huberman's use of two taxpayer-funded cars -- a perk not available to previous school chiefs.

The schools on Thursday returned Huberman's 2009 Ford Escape Hybrid and five other vehicles to the leasing company at the urging of the inspector general.

Huberman used the Ford Escape to drive to work and for school-related trips at a cost to taxpayers of more than $800 a month. The vehicle was in addition to a Ford Crown Victoria he rides in while in Chicago; the district leases it for about $1,000 a month, not including driver pay.

The Tribune story prompted criticism about the vehicles' costs, especially with layoffs looming and deep cuts to school programs.

Inspector General James Sullivan confirmed Thursday that his office is investigating but declined to elaborate.

The story also prompted the administration to review its leasing program and discover procedures were not followed, said Monique Bond, schools spokeswoman.

The schools have a contract with Ryder Transportation Services to supply vehicles. But Bond said Huberman's Escape and five other vehicles assigned to senior staff were -- for undetermined reasons -- leased from Enterprise Leasing Co. in violation of school policy and procedures. She said the schools do not have a contract with Enterprise and that the problem resides with the Transportation Department.

"That department is responsible," Bond said. "I don't want to implicate any individual, but we found out that policies were not followed ... Those found to be responsible will face severe disciplinary action."

Vehicles should have been leased under a three-year contract with Ryder that the school board approved in August 2007, Bond said. Ryder has been paid more than $1.5 million under the contract, according to records. Bond said officials also learned Enterprise was to supply 36 cars to the student-driver program and there was no contract for the cars.

"Ron is upset that proper procedures were not followed," she said. "He's troubled. He's embarrassed, and he's angry."

Bond defended Huberman's use of two vehicles, saying he works long hours and it made no sense for a driver to make trips to his home.

"At this time, he is not going to have two cars," Bond said. "He's given up the SUV."

tlighty@tribune.com

aahmed@tribune.com

Copyright © 2010, Chicago Tribune

Find the Ho

Me, in my Baltimore accent: Find your Holes.

Israel: Let me leave so I can round them up.

Me: What?

Israel: Let me leave so I can round them up.

Me: I don't understand. I said, find your Holes.

Israel: If you want me to find my "ho's" I need to walk around the block and look for them.

Me: blank stare (Why? I don't know.)

Israel: Get it? My ho's. I need to find them.

Me: (Pause....then very professionally erupt into uncontrollable laughter.)

Another day at the office.

Find the vibrator

So, in science, I was explaining the difference between direct current and alternating current.

Me: Can someone give me an example of something that runs on alternating current.

Student 1: The computers.

Me: Right. What about direct current?

Student 2: The pencil sharpener.

Me: Try again.

Student 3: The television.

Me: Try again. Remember batteries provide direct current.

Student 4: A cell phone.

Me: Yes when it is not plugged in and charging up. Anything else?

Ismael: A vibrator.

Me: Correct. If it's battery operated. Anything else?

Student 1: A Gameboy.

Me: Yes. O.k. time to get ready for Social Studies.

Absenteeism

Sorry to all my "fan" that I have been absent from the Chalkboard. The month of December is just crazy. Progress reports go out. The kids are extra...uhmm....energetic. Assemblies are planned and put on. It's exhausting. Good exhausting. But, exhausting. Also, I felt like I was blahging about my students and that's not the point of the Chalkboard Warrior. I want to highlight the policies and laws that contradict each other and interfere with the teaching process.

Here's a new one. 12 year old students who are hospitalized in psychiatric wards now have the right to sign or not sign "Request for Information" forms. An RFI is a form where doctors and schools sign agreements to share each other's findings. This is in the interest of collaborating with experts to provide the best care and environment a student needs.

Well. Let me refresh your memory. My student, Ismael, is a well known "wannabe"--a kid who wants to be a gang banger. In my experience, every wannabe I've met succeeded in becoming a gang banger. So, really, a wannabe is in the community college stage of gang banging. But, I digress. Ismael is the student who pretended to first stab, then shoot me, then feigned a woman screaming as she died. Then, when after the big "help Ismael" was organized, he refused to go to the hospital and was eventually taken there in handcuffs because he had become so belligerent to the police. Ismael then spent two weeks in the psychiatric ward of a local hospital. Now, I have had students sent to the hospital for psychiatric reasons who were sent home that day and never saw the psychiatric ward. I have had students sent to the hospital who were then enrolled in the hospital's day program in the psychiatric ward. And I have had students sent to the hospital who were committed for two weeks. Rarely. But, it happens. And when Ismael was taken to the hospital, he stayed for two weeks. He was in bad shape.

When he returned, he was a different kid. The sweet side of him shined--he stayed in his seat, raised his hand when he wanted to speak, came to school in uniform and followed all the rules without question. He was obviously on medication. Not so much that he was "drugged out," but on the amount he needed to help him focus and succeed. The release form from the hospital, which is always sent to the school, had absolutely no information on it except to say that Ismael had indeed been in the hospital and his absences were excused. No information about medication. No information about therapy. No information about how the school can help support Ismael.

So, the case manager called the hospital. According to the hospital, there is a new HIPAA law that states anyone TWELVE years and older gets to sign the RFI and Israel had refused. A couple weeks back into school, he stopped wearing his uniform. He started "tagging" in his note books--that's the new fancy term for graffiti. He's shaking hands with fellow wannabes in the hallway, complete with the Raza R, the local boys club. I mean the local gang. So, the case manager called again, just in case. No go. Israel determines his post care.

Now, I have not done sufficient research on this law just yet. So, I will continue this post once I find out more about this HIPAA law. But, I ask you, should a CHILD be in charge of their medical care and the coordination of their medical care with their school system. And, if you think, well that sounds about right, I was mature enough when I was 12, let me put it this way: Should a TWELVE year old child who has been hospitalized in a psychiatric ward, who has a history of violence toward adults, be charged with their medical care. Because, I can assure you, a twelve year old wannabe charged with that much responsibility and that much history of violence and instability will one day be charged with a crime. Or end up in a morgue. And that is terrible. And society will pay for failing this child. And my heart breaks a little bit more as my hands are tied tighter behind my back.

It's the little things

"Why do you keep teaching in that school?" I hear this all the time.

First, the school where I work is excellent. We are a piece of heaven in the midst of chaos for a lot of my students. We have a former graduate who earned the Bill and Melinda Gates scholarship. That's a scholarship that sends students to school and covers every expense until they have earned their doctoral degrees. We have graduates who have received the prestigious Nordstrom scholarships. We have students coming back to visit to tell us how their college days, careers, and families are going. We have students here whose grandparents came to this school. Even though I often blahg about the instances that bring me down, there are many reasons why I teach and one big reason is the little things. The little victories.

Yesterday, Donovan asked to speak to me privately. All my students know if they have a concern, a question, a complaint, a desire to hit someone but don't want to get in trouble, they can ask to speak to me privately. Donovan asking to speak to me privately is huge. He was my student who all last year only spoke to me when he was calling me a "b" or telling me to go to "h." He's the one who earlier this year called me "liar" so many times, I was thinking of buying a vanity license plate with my new nickname.

As is all too often the case, the story Donovan needed to tell me broke my heart. He apologized to me for not turning in his science project on time because the night before he was helping his mother take care of his step-father who had come home drunk, throwing up all over the place. I thanked him for sharing and gave him all the feedback that we special ed. teachers are taught to give back in these kinds of instances. Then, we discussed the goals he has set out for himself this year, which includes graduating and adding another general education science class. I told him he needs to think about how seriously he wants to achieve his goals. I then explained that he needed to show me how serious he is about these goals and if he was, he would have to bring the project into me today. This surprised him because, as he noted, this was not a day students were going to be attending since it was a professional day (PD) for teachers. I told him someone would be in the office to let him in, and he could ask one of the office clerks to put it in my mailbox. Then, I let that conversation go and did not set myself up for disapointment or excitement or what have you.

After our morning PD and our celebratory lunch for the new principal, I went to my mailbox and there sitting in it like a pot of gold was Donovan's completed science project and the colored pencils he borrowed.

And that moment of seeing that science project in my mailbox is a moment I get to have every now and again as a teacher. And it is a moment that I never experienced in the corporate world. I am very lucky. And I feel honored over and over again that I am allowed to spend my days in the company of children who more than often beat the odds and pull themselves up by the bootstraps more times than I have ever needed to.

Smoking Pot

I have this student. He was one of my stars last year. So sweet. So helpful. Tried really hard.

This year, a completely different kid. When I give a direction, he crosses his arms, slumps back in his seat and sighs. If I call him on his inappropriate behavior, which escalates as the day goes on, he mutters under his breath, "she" this "she" that, "I don't care," "she can't make me do anything."

I've called his mom. I've talked to our security guard who is also the soccer coach to help him out. I've met with the school counselor several times about how worried I am that he is so different than last year. He is in the school leadership group that is run by the area police officers. He attends CAPS--a Chicago Police outreach program--on Saturdays. He is surrounded by support. And, he was chosen to participate in an after-school music program, which he has not been attending because, he said, he was grounded. He lied. His sister, very bravely, came forward with the truth.

From 2:45 to 4:30 every day, he is getting high.

Who is supplying him the drugs? Two people.

1. His cousin. A former student.
2. Ismael. A current student.

Fabulous.

A half hour after finding this information out, I attended a meeting where the theme was, "get those scores up."

O.k.

Now I am slumped in my chair and sighing.

updates

Ismael's sister asked to speak to me privately. She told me Ismael called her and asked her to tell me that he is sorry. So sad. He is in the hospital, getting the medication and therapy that he needs. I'm glad he is finally getting hope, and have my fingers crossed that the help continues once he is released from the hospital.

I have radiating pains going up and down my arm and into my back, so blogging is signficantly down. So, sorry if the blog is less enjoyable. Not feeling really humorous.

Today I got observed for my annual review. I TOTALLY forgot that it was today. The case manager was in my classroom working on the computer, I decided to throw my old lesson plans out the proverbial window and went a different way, then in walked the assistant principal. I thought she was coming in to talk to the case manager, but then she sat down and pulled out the check list. I really shouldn't care. But, I do. I'm a goody two shoes, a teacher's pet, a brown noser, what have you, and I like to be appreciated. I HATE teacher evaluations. When I was in the corporate world, the reviews I got were glowing. But, there's some school of thought in the education world that if no criticism is provided then it's not a valuable review. I know that. But, I still cringe at the idea of having to hear criticisms. Makes me want to cry. The only glowing on my reviews is the sparkles my tear drops leave. Oy.

In two weeks, I'm getting a new student. Ella. Ellie. She is a blog in and of herself. I will tell you more about her tomorrow.

Blue and White, Let's Go! Blue and White, Let's Go! Yay Panthers!!!!!

Well

Ismael is in the hospital. And fingers crossed, they admit him. He was brought to school today by his mother. She tried to take him to the hospital yesterday, but he ran away. And she actually didn't bring him to school, she tricked him into going in despite the fact that she was coming as well. She told him she was buying candy apples for our Affy Tapple sale. Anyway, when Ismael got to school, he and his mother went to the social worker's office. The school police were called in case he tried to run away from mom again. (This was all planned yesterday afternoon between the case manager, mom and the Chicago Police Department.) When Ismael was told he was going to the hospital, he became belligerent. The police walked in to help. He became belligerent to the police and started cussing him out. He was handcuffed. He broke down in tears. And they took him to the hospital. He breaks my heart. He really breaks my heart.

Hmmmm

Anecdotals from today, 10/21/2009 [info. in brackets is added for understanding and therapy...you'll see]

9:00 First day back from suspension, ([Ismael is] wearing baggy jeans [might not seem like a big deal unless you read on and have seen the YouTube of the kid who hides guns in his jeans]

[City-Wide Testing Day..scores used to evaluate student and teacher performance]
10:15 As I was helping another student, Ismael said repeatedly under his breath "Shut the fuck up, bitch." Kept repeating "bitch."

10:20 As I was helping another student, out of the corner of my eye, I saw Ismael stand up behind me and pretend to overhand stab me with a pencil. I turned to face him and he sat down and continued to pretend to stab me with a pencil. (Another student witnessed.)

10:40 Ismael got up out of seat. I asked him to sit down [mind you, I walked over to him and basically whispered it so not to disturb the students testing]. He told me to "shut the fuck up bitch," then pretneded to shoot me. [He was polite about it, though, he was very quiet about it.]

10:55 I collected all of the test books. Ismael stood up, pretended to shoot me again, then feigned being shot and fell on his chair, graspoing his chest [imitating what a woman would sound like dying. Fabulous.]