updates

Ismael's sister asked to speak to me privately. She told me Ismael called her and asked her to tell me that he is sorry. So sad. He is in the hospital, getting the medication and therapy that he needs. I'm glad he is finally getting hope, and have my fingers crossed that the help continues once he is released from the hospital.

I have radiating pains going up and down my arm and into my back, so blogging is signficantly down. So, sorry if the blog is less enjoyable. Not feeling really humorous.

Today I got observed for my annual review. I TOTALLY forgot that it was today. The case manager was in my classroom working on the computer, I decided to throw my old lesson plans out the proverbial window and went a different way, then in walked the assistant principal. I thought she was coming in to talk to the case manager, but then she sat down and pulled out the check list. I really shouldn't care. But, I do. I'm a goody two shoes, a teacher's pet, a brown noser, what have you, and I like to be appreciated. I HATE teacher evaluations. When I was in the corporate world, the reviews I got were glowing. But, there's some school of thought in the education world that if no criticism is provided then it's not a valuable review. I know that. But, I still cringe at the idea of having to hear criticisms. Makes me want to cry. The only glowing on my reviews is the sparkles my tear drops leave. Oy.

In two weeks, I'm getting a new student. Ella. Ellie. She is a blog in and of herself. I will tell you more about her tomorrow.

Blue and White, Let's Go! Blue and White, Let's Go! Yay Panthers!!!!!

Well

Ismael is in the hospital. And fingers crossed, they admit him. He was brought to school today by his mother. She tried to take him to the hospital yesterday, but he ran away. And she actually didn't bring him to school, she tricked him into going in despite the fact that she was coming as well. She told him she was buying candy apples for our Affy Tapple sale. Anyway, when Ismael got to school, he and his mother went to the social worker's office. The school police were called in case he tried to run away from mom again. (This was all planned yesterday afternoon between the case manager, mom and the Chicago Police Department.) When Ismael was told he was going to the hospital, he became belligerent. The police walked in to help. He became belligerent to the police and started cussing him out. He was handcuffed. He broke down in tears. And they took him to the hospital. He breaks my heart. He really breaks my heart.

Hmmmm

Anecdotals from today, 10/21/2009 [info. in brackets is added for understanding and therapy...you'll see]

9:00 First day back from suspension, ([Ismael is] wearing baggy jeans [might not seem like a big deal unless you read on and have seen the YouTube of the kid who hides guns in his jeans]

[City-Wide Testing Day..scores used to evaluate student and teacher performance]
10:15 As I was helping another student, Ismael said repeatedly under his breath "Shut the fuck up, bitch." Kept repeating "bitch."

10:20 As I was helping another student, out of the corner of my eye, I saw Ismael stand up behind me and pretend to overhand stab me with a pencil. I turned to face him and he sat down and continued to pretend to stab me with a pencil. (Another student witnessed.)

10:40 Ismael got up out of seat. I asked him to sit down [mind you, I walked over to him and basically whispered it so not to disturb the students testing]. He told me to "shut the fuck up bitch," then pretneded to shoot me. [He was polite about it, though, he was very quiet about it.]

10:55 I collected all of the test books. Ismael stood up, pretended to shoot me again, then feigned being shot and fell on his chair, graspoing his chest [imitating what a woman would sound like dying. Fabulous.]

Yell

When a teacher yells, all it does is teach the kids that the teacher is out of control. A good teacher uses behavior management plans, creative lessons, and good old fashion hard work to keeping a class running smoothly. But, I yelled. It was dumb. All I did was let the kids know that I have a breaking point and they found it. Now I am going to pay. They will try to find the breaking point over and over again. If only I could spend my energies planning my lessons and working on behavior management plans. But, this week, I had two 8th grade IEPs on Tuesday that took the entire day, so my class that is full of students who don't do well with change, spent the entire day in different classes doing "independent work." I stayed till 5:15 last night writing one IEP and I still have another one to finish. And, we are getting audited tomorrow by the LRE people, so they'll be observing me, and one of the things they will be looking at are the IEPs. And, I couldn't stay late today because Betty had Irish dance class (and she missed the last two classes), so I tried to get some stuff done while I had my students work on projects, but of course they were throwing gang signs across the room and calling each other names and basically complaining about everything, everything, everything. So, today I yelled. I will try to do better tomorrow.

Q&A

For a transition questionnaire that is asked of eighth graders getting ready for high school (and I read aloud), one question posed was "What concerns do you have about your future?" One student said, "not graduating." I told him, "write that down." He asked, "how do you spell 'not graduating.'"

Another student was given a Q&A. One of the questions was, "What is your best class?" He wrote "batman."

If these make you giggle, that's o.k. But, it's a little sad too. It's quite a range of students with IEPs in the general education classes. (I'll add more anecdotes to this post as they happen. :)

Hoops

When I walked into the office yesterday during my prep period and saw three of my homeroom students (30% of my class) sitting in the waiting area, I knew it was a full moon. And it was.

Ismael cussed out just three too many teachers;
Pedro was chewing off his nails and spitting them across the room; and
Donavan called me a "liar" about 30 times in a 10 minute period as well as announced it every time he caught site of me as I worked in the back office. I can't even remember why he decided I am a liar.

Today, Pedro's mom came in and met with the social worker, and that seemed to go well, since he had a much better day today. I should have been at that meeting, but I was called into another more "important" meeting where I along with the other co-teachers (that's general ed/special ed teachers who team teach) were read an email that we all received and read ourselves last week.

Donovan's parents met with the social worker, the case manager and me in the afternoon to discuss his increasingly belligerent behavior. They have an already-planned psychiatric appointment for him and are finally open to having him on medication, which his doctor has been strongly recommending for two years now.

All of this is good news and I'd like to expand more, but area officers are coming tomorrow to make sure that we are all teaching, so I have to get my hoops ready to jump through. "I can" statements need to be out and about. "I can" do it.